Lady Lion

Little Primarchs- Valdor Stories

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The Primarchs were bored. The Emperor had been called in to settle a debate between three forge worlds, and the debate was going on longer than anticipated. Valdor was coming to relieve Malcador of the Primarchs. Unfortunately for Malcador, it meant that he had to babysit the rest of the Imperium.
"How are they?" Valdor asked Malcador as they paused in the doorway.
"Bored," Malcador said. "Not much has happened since you all came back from Extinction Park."
"I can believe that they aren't too happy with that," Valdor said. Malcador nodded and then departed. Valdor entered with caution. Bored Primarchs were always problematic. It was boredom that had caused the drinking contest between Leman and Mortarion that resulted in Valdor being bitten by Leman. The Emperor had in fact removed all the alcohol from the residence after that.
"Hello, Primarchs," Valdor said, they all looked up at him, most nodded, though there were some smiles and a few waves. He moved to the couch that the Emperor was typically found on. It was the largest of the three couches in the room, meant for the Emperor and Valdor specifically, though the Primarchs climbed onto it anyway.
"Can you tell us a story, Valdor?" Fulgrim asked. Valdor raised an eyebrow, he didn't think that many of his stories were particualarly interesting.
"Yeah!" Lorgar said.
"What kind of story?" Valdor asked.
"Something from when you were becoming a Custodian?" Magnus asked.
"Alright," Valdor said. He found it hard to deny the Primarchs anything, and he had a few good stories of that time.
"Can we see pictures from when you were becoming a Custodian?" Fulgrim asked.
"I think we can do that," Valdor said with a smile as he stood up and moved to the cogitator unit, tapping a few commands into the runeboard, he pulled up his own Custodian file. The file opened up onto the pict from when Valdor was presented to the Emperor.
"That can't be you," Angron said as they all gazed at the image.
"Are you blushing, Valdor?" the Lion asked. Valdor's face did seem to be coloring.
"What are you wearing?" Fulgrim asked, looking at the pict with distaste.
"I believe those were formal clothes," Valdor said. The picture was of a small child, who was apparently Valdor. He was wearing an orange-pink shirt that was so loose that it almost looked like a tent. It was clearly meant for him though, as the sleeves stopped precisely at his wrists, and the body of it at his waist. Below the shirt, was an orange-yellow piece of clothing that could have either been pants, or a skirt. It was so pleated that the Primarchs were not at all sure, the only thing they knew, for sure was that it went to Valdor's knee. Below the knee was a pair of tan boots.
"Is that a skirt?" Fulgrim asked.
"I don't remember," Valdor said. As with everyone else who became a trans human, Valdor's memory from before he became a Custodian were fuzzy. Valdor used the term "muted" to describe the few memories that he retained.
"It looks ridiculous," Fulgrim said.
"It is a very strange garment," Valdor said with a chuckle.
"Did you ever notice the accellerated growth?" Corvus asked.
"You are growing at about the same rate that I was growing then," Valdor said. "Do you notice your growth?"
"Not really," Corvus said with a smile.
"I notice the painful way sometimes," Vulkan said.
"I did several times as well," Valdor said. This caused a chuckle from several of the Primarchs. Imagining Valdor hitting his head on various things was hilarious.
"What was the first heighten sense you noticed?" Horus asked.
"Smell," Valdor said without hesitation. "Xandren wasn't the best at showering at first."
"Really?" Leman said with surprise. Valdor nodded. Xandren was well known for being chosen for envoy missions. The Primarchs always viewed him as well groomed.
"Really," Valdor said. "Some of us who were slightly ahead in the process dragged him into the shower one day. Unfortunatly for us, his shouts gained your father's attention."
"What did Father do?" Mortarion asked.
"He asked for an explanation," Valdor said. "Somehow, I got nominated spokesman of the group. When I finished telling your father what we were doing, he had us hold Xandren and bathed him."
"That must have been embarassing," Konrad said. Valdor nodded, smiling at the memory.
"What about some of the other organs?" Angron asked. "Did you have any problems with the activated ones, like the Betcher's Gland?"
"I didn't have an issue with my Betcher's Gland," Valdor said. The Betcher's Gland was an extra organ that the Space Marines and Primarchs had. The Custodians had a variant of the same thing, it added acid to their saliva. "Cavlor did though."
"He did?" the Lion said, nearly drowned out by Angron's cry of "That's what happened to his face?"
"Yes," Valdor said to both Primarchs. "He subconsciously activated his Betcher's Gland while he slept. Seems he drooled, and you have seen the results." Cavlor was one of the Custodians who trained the Primarchs. Due to this he was Angron's second favorite Custodian. Valdor then fixed all of the Primarchs with a serious stare.
"You have to all promise never to tell Cavlor that you know the truth," Valdor said. "No one outside of the Ten Thousand is supposed to know, excepting your father of course."
"We promise," Horus said for the group. Everyone else nodded. There was no hiding the scarring that disfigured the lower part of the left side of Cavlor's face, but the Primarchs had never asked. They all had assumed that he had earned the scars in some form of battle.
"Did you specifically ever have issues with any of the activated organs?" the Lion asked Valdor.
"I once caused my catalepsean node to misfire," Valdor said quietly. "In the middle of a speech by your father."
"What happened?" Roboute asked.
"I'm told I caused quite the scene," Valdor said. "Seems I made a very loud crash when I collapsed."
"You're told?" Magnus asked, confused.
"I don't remember the event itself," Valdor said. "Seems that when a catalepsean node misfires it erases memories for a bit before the misfire, and no memories are formed until it stops."
"Was Father mad?" Lorgar asked.
"No," Valdor said. "He was more interested in learning what happened and how I caused the node to misfire. There were several psychic probes over the next few hours."
"Do you remember how you did it?" Alpharius asked.
"No, it's one of the things that was erased," Valdor said. "I remember arriving at the location, determining that it was safe, and the very beginning of the speech, then nothing until I woke up."
"That must be weird," Sanguinius said. "Unless your memory hadn't been affected yet."
"It had been," Valdor said. "It's about the only time where I can't remember when I wasn't injured."
"And that doesn't happen very often," Vulkan said.
"True," Valdor said with a smile. It was beginning to get late and the Primarchs had Nova in the morning, so Valdor sent them to bed.
"Can we stay up and wait for Father?" Horus asked. This was a typical question from him when the Emperor didn't return before bedtime.
"No, you have Nova tomorrow," Valdor said firmly. "Besides, I don't know when your father will be returning." Horus pouted, but then headed to bed. Valdor shook his head gently. It was rare for the Emperor to be so busy that he couldn't return to the residence, but it did happen. It always grated on those who had to watch the Primarchs.
Valdor wondered if it grated on the Primarchs just as much, and decided that it probably did. Though they had each other to make it a bit better, at least he liked to think so. He only had the other Custodians for brothers, they shared kindred, but not in the same way that the Primarchs had. Custodians were independant of each other, this was in stark contrast to the Space Marines. Valdor couldn't remember if he had biological brothers from before, his file didn't mention any, so he assumed no. He assured that the Primarchs were all in bed, and then waited for the Emperor's return.


  1. Nyctophora's Avatar
    Hmmm...babysitting the Primarchs, or babysitting the Imperium? Which is the harder task? A question the Administratum ponders to this day.
  2. Lady Lion's Avatar
    The galaxy may never know.


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